Welcome to my mind

It's been two weeks since it all fell apart. Five days since it finally ended. Since she left...
Everything happend so fast I couldn't grasp it. From the beginning everything moved forward really fast, maybe too fast. It just kept going and going forward until it couldn't go any further and then it just stopped. And no it's gone.
Every day I feel physically sick. Every day I feel the absence of her, like a part of me was missing.
I don't blame her. I just couldn't keep her happy. It always goes like this. I try and try and in the end it's me who's left behind. That's how it's always been. I was a fool to think this time things would be different. It's always the same.
I don't even know why I'm writing this. I'm not writing it to be read by anyone. Especially her. But she probably will and to that all I have to say, don't feel bad for me. These are just things for me that have to be said, not necessarily heard.
Sometimes I just wish I didn't  care this much, but that's life. I can't change how I feel. All I can do is hold on and hope for the best.